things that make me laugh...

I'm new, Ok?

Dear Friends, it has been too long. I have had full intentions of writing but things keep coming up. I'm still getting used to this habitual blogging thing, I'm new, ok? One day I'll have it down. Until then, let's dive into the recent happenings of my life.

First I'd like to preface by saying don't buy Kinoki foot pads. I'm glad I tried them, sad they don't work, and want my 20 bucks back. I only used them 3 times, and A' thought it would be funny to try them out too. He put one on his chest, the other on his butt cheek and wouldn't you know it- not a damn thing happened! He woke up the next morning and the pads looked like he had just taken them out of the box. They weren't dirty, dark, hard-nothing. Weird. Anyway, I don't care enough to continue them (I'm an immediate results kinda girl) so maybe I'll put them on Craig's List Free Stuff section.

Second, the past week has been a little crazy. First birthday antics, then I had some stupid, stupid boy drama (thank god that's over) and this weekend one of my good friends from work got married. We had such a good time. The drive home the next morning was not such a good time however.

Aside from my life that keeps getting in the way of this little experiment of mine, I have been diligently trying to make myself more politically educated. With the upcoming election looming around the corner it's hard not to be bombarded with political propaganda everywhere you turn (I was an advertising major for god's sake) I've never been into politics of any form. My parents and both my brothers are deep into politics but it has never interested me. It doesn't help much either when your college political science professor tells you not to vote because "your vote doesn't count". Very encouraging professor.

Even though I'm not so much interested in politics, I've always envied people who could discuss political matters at length. Please don't get this confused with people who get emotionally involved and ARGUE political views- those people I do NOT envy. These people I think are a small bit crazy. Maybe it's my fault for not having anything that I'm that passionate about... except maybe my stance on smoking, which we'll surely get to at a later post.

The first, and probably most frustrating, hurdle I've found when trying to gather political information is trying to find reliable, non-biased sources. There is SO much information out there, but is it truely information, or misinformation? Or is it in fact uselful information that is endorsed by the party it is supporting making everything positively reflect the candidate in question. It's overwhelming.

I've been spending a lot of time reading both the hard hitting facts and the smut, and I still don't feel educated at all. I don't understand how people get into this stuff. Maybe I should talk to my brothers- although that would be highly biased. I just have a hard time focusing on politics when I would much rather be reading non-sensical celebrity gossip or updating my myspace. Sad, I know. But, that's part of the reason I'm doing this little experiment. I'm striving to be a more well-rounded person. Not only will I be able to tell you the names of all of Britney Spears' dogs, but I can also tell you about off-shore drilling and foreign policy (or at least I'll try!)

I'm going to continue my research this week, maybe I'll even talk to some folks on both sides of issues and see why they are voting for the candidate that they are and not the other. Also this week I plan on sitting down and working on my creative portfolio! This has been a LONG time coming. I actually set a deadline for myself to have it done by October 1st, but I'm not so sure that will happen.

Last, and certainly not least today, I'd like to wish a Happy 6th Birthday to my favorite puppy in the whole wide world- Cooper!!! I see a large, juicy bone in your future!

I've been a bad, bad blogger...

Hello to my 2 faithful readers!  I'm sorry it's been so long since my last post, but our Internet quit working :(  However, I think it back on track... 80% on track.  Hopefully it will stay strong.  So, over the past few days I haven't really been focusing too hard on trying new things (don't be mad at me) but I have been trying out being 25.

Yes, Saturday was my birthday, and I had a great time.  All day I got texts and phone calls from friends and family.  I couldn't believe how many people remembered my birthday.  I even got 2 random texts from numbers I didn't know... strange.  That night we hit the town and needless to say, I'm obviously getting older.  For starters, our group seemed a little smaller than in past years.  Oh, and not to mention I realized while starring at everyone in my drunken haze, that really only 1 person there was MY friend.  Everyone else was a friend of A's.  I know that when you're in a relationship his friends are my friends and vice versa but man... that seemed depressing.

Don't get me wrong, most of my friends don't live in town, one was sick, one had "car trouble", but it still seemed kind of sad.  Whatever, I got over it after about 9 shots.  At that time I also realized that I was getting older because there was no way in hell that I was heading out to the next club we had intended on.  I-was-wasted.  All I wanted to do was dance, but instead I ended up starring down a dirty bar toilet making sure there was no puke on my hot pink heels.  Nope, I was good.  Now hold your head high and act sober.  Well, I found out over the past few days that I wasn't fooling anyone, oh well.  So as I watched the younger half of the bunch head off to another bar I was being carried out to sit on the curb, drink my water, and wait for my mom to pick us up.  Yes, my mom picked us up from the bar.

Now, I've been drunk in front of my mom several times, but I honestly don't even remember the ride home at all.  She told me the next day that I was pretty entertaining (supposedly I left some pretty nasty voicemails for the no-shows of the group during the ride...oops)  She showed up just as the bar we were at was closing and picked me up... no literally... picked me up from the curb and shoveled me into the backseat between my 2 best friends.  Oh, what an evening it was. 

Sunday morning I woke up still drunk and craving some biscuits and gravy and good company.  Over breakfast we shared stories, all of which I don't remember, and pictures that were taken the night before, all of which I don't want to remember. After breakfast it was family time.  Now, I don't know if you remember my first post where I mentioned that I had been neglecting to call my Granny?  Well, she was at the family birthday party.  Thanks for letting me know everybody.  Had I known Granny and her must-leave-a-negative-comment-about-anything-that-anyone-says self was going to be present I would have made it a point to call her beforehand.  But instead, there I was, face to face with her, and trust me, she hadn't forgotten that I still, after (oh, 4 months?) called her back.  I assured her that she was on my list of callbacks, and that it was terribly long.  She kind of rolled her eyes and said that if I wasn't going to call then I would just have to come by and visit.  Don't worry, I'll call.

Family birthday parties tend to become lamer as you get older, but this year I was pretty impressed.  Pizza, my favorite chocolate cake and some GREAT gifts.  Aside from the Sex and the City complete series box set that A' got me, a great John Mayer CD the bestie got me and some other random treasures, my family all pooled together to get me a brand new iPod nano and a speaker set that goes with it.  I won't bore you with the details of this sweet little gem, so let me just give you one feature of this new nano that might blow your mind the way it did mine.  If you don't like the song you're currently listening to simply SHAKE IT and it shuffles to a random song for you.  Yes, shake it.  Are you kidding me?  I'm in love.  

The night ended with a fantastic dinner with the soon to be in-laws.  Great food, great company, which all made for a great night of sleep.  Overall, I had a great birthday.  There were a few good friends, in their defense, forgetful friends, who forgot to call me, my coworkers forgot to pass around the generic card that everyone signs, but I think it all made me realize how unimportant the little things are. 

Alright, so enough about the birthday, back to the purpose of this blog.  Yes, I've been slacking, but I think I have a plan.  Many of the things I want to accomplish will probably take more than a day to execute (I mean, who can learn how to play a guitar in 1 day?).  So I think i might aim for a new goal each week.  Sure, I can throw in some other random acts on certain days if I'm feelin it, but I think once a week might me more reasonable.  

Ok friends, off to bed.  But not before I stick on my 3rd application of Kinoki foot pads- which so far appear to be a total scam because I feel no different at all.  Goodnight! 

Foot Detox: Fact or Fiction?

So, I'm not entirely sure yet, but I think I might have been scammed.  It's not often that I fall victim to those addicting infomercials but this time, I did.  I've been seeing commercials for the Kinoki Foot Pads for a while now and from the beginning I thought it was a load of crap.  It wasn't until I saw my local CVS store carrying them that I thought maybe they weren't entirely crap.  

If you're not familiar with the Kinoki Foot Pads, or any other brand for that matter, let me give you a quick rundown.  The Kinoki Foot Pads are essentially "detox" pads for your body.  They are small, herbal patches that you apply to the bottoms of you feet at night and while you sleep they are supposed to pull out the toxins in your body.  Sounds impossible, yes, am I a sucker, yes as well.  So I shelled out the $20 to give it a whirl.

Last night I opened the package and read the instructions.  The first thing that surprised me about the foot pads is they aren't actually a simple pad you apply to your foot, but rather a 2 part pad you have to assemble, then place on your foot.  It comes with a gauze patch and the herbal packet.  Another thing I found interesting is that you don't have to apply these to your feet, you can put them anywhere.  I'm contemplating trying them on my butt cheeks next go round....

First step: wash and dry your feet.  Second, you pull off the adhesive strip on the gauze patch and open the herbal packet.  Place the herbal packet in the center of the gauze patch and apply to the bottoms of your feet (or ass cheeks)  You have the option of either applying one patch to one foot each night, alternating feet, or one pad on each feet every other night.  I decided to take it to the limit and use one patch on each foot last night to see where that would take me.  

When I woke up this morning and removed the foot patches the herbal packets did turn dark like the infomercials promised.  What I found weird was that not only were they dark, but they were hard too, which kind of grossed me out.  I removed the patches and went on with my day, hoping to feel refreshed and rejuvenated like the commercials promised.  Well... that wasn't exactly the case...

I did wake up pretty easily, which is NOT the case for me, ever.  I could sleep all day long if someone would allow me, but this morning at 5 am I was up and at em.  As the day wore on I was insanely dehydrated.  I have no idea if it was a result of these foot pads or not but man... I seriously drank probably an entire water tower today.  I also felt sick to my stomach for a good majority of the day.  I didn't eat anything out of the norm or do anything strange so again, I'm not sure if Kinoki is to blame or what.  Overall, I have to say that one night was not enough to gauge the effects the foot pads had on me.  You are supposed to use them until the discoloration wears off, so I will continue to use them as I am supposed to, hoping for something miraculous to happen.

I did some research today from consumers who have tried Kinoki Foot Pads in the past and I was pretty embarrassed.  Most people just said it's a scam, the pads turn dark from water on the patches, it's a placebo, etc.  This may be the case, but I would have never known if I didn't try it.  I'm going to use them again tomorrow and I'll keep you posted.  I'm sure it's a scam.... I'm such a sucker.  As for now it's off to bed with my crazy kitty, Bingo.  Tomorrow's Friday!!!!  Goodnight!

Something's missing...

Some people don't even own a cell phone.  Others could live without it.  Me on the other hand, I'm obsessed with my phone.  I am a compulsive texter and constantly have my phone on me.  I'm not exaggerating when I say that either, sometimes I take it to the bathroom with me.  Sad, I know. So today I decided to turn it off- all day.  In fact, it's still off.  And I must say, I'm not enjoying it.  

When I woke up this morning I immediately turned my cell off.  It felt weird but I tried to reassure  myself that maybe this would take a little stress out of my day.  I did tell my mom and A' that my phone would be off so they wouldn't worry if they tried calling, but aside from them nobody else knew.  

On the way to work I was bored and instead of calling someone I was forced to listen to lame morning radio programs.  It made for a boring ride but I was still trying to be open minded.  When I got to work I already had a missed call from A' on my work phone.  I thought for a second that something was wrong.  Why would he call my work phone before I even got to work?  I wanted to turn on my cell to see if he had left me a voicemail or sent me a text but I resisted.  I called him back and everything was fine, he just wanted to chat.

Once work started things were going better than expected.  I really felt like not having that distraction there or even the temptation to take a break and text someone made me more productive and even a little less stressed out than when my phone is on.  I did, however,  find myself going through some of the usual mannerisms I would if my phone were on.  When I came back from meetings I reached for my phone to see if anyone had called or texted.  There were countless times today that I reached for my phone wondering what time it was.  I never really realized how much I relied on my phone as a watch (which I guess would explain why I never wear a watch)  

Several times throughout the day I thought of things that I needed... ok, probably more like wanted to tell people.  Usually I would just send someone a quick text but not today.  When I did talk to A' on the phone I had to try and remember all the little things I was going to tell him, half of which I forgot.  I needed to ask my sister-in-law something and realized I didn't know her number!  It got me thinking... who's numbers DO I know?!  When I stopped to think about it, it was pretty sad how few phone numbers I have memorized or even written down somewhere.  I realized that I really only have a few numbers memorized.  My mom, A', my best friend and one other friend, only 1 of my brother's (sorry Chaz- I don't know your number!) and that pretty much sums it up.  It was pretty sad.  I think after that realization I'm going to write down all of the numbers in my phone just in case.  

So, I made it through the work day.  I wasn't happy, but by this point I had kind of gotten used to it.  The drive home was awful because I was stuck in rush hour traffic with no phone.  When I got home I used the landline phone (which I pretty much forgot we even had) to make a call.  As the night wore on I kind of forgot about my phone and was busy doing other things, but it was still weird not to have it in my hand everywhere I went.

Overall it was a very odd day.  I felt out of sorts, like I forgot to put on pants or something.  I think it's pretty sad to rely on my cell phone that much, but that's just how I am.  It really wasn't as hard as I thought it would be, but it definitely wasn't easy.  I can't wait for tomorrow morning to turn it on again... I'm sure I'll only have like 1 missed call, zero texts :P

Tomorrow I'm trying a new product from one of those crazy infomercials that I've always wanted to try. Hopefully it turns out as cool as it is on TV and not a sham... guess we'll have to see!  Goodnight. 

Lame Day Tuesday

It's Tuesday.  And I've been pretty lame today.  I've typed 3 drafts to this post so far and I've deleted them all.  Here's to starting over.  

Today I learned:

• 5:30 is too early for me to wake up
• sleeping in makes me late to work, therefore no time for coffee
• my job is even lamer today than it was yesterday
• my managers don't really care what we have to say
• crying at work is really stupid and makes you feel like a pussy
• finding happiness in others is an easy solution to your unhappiness
• little things, like seeing A hiding from me behind his truck, can make me forget everything from 5:30 am on
• falling asleep in yoga class is great
• coming home to someone you love and a sweet, snuggling kitty is even greater
• going to sleep knowing tomorrow is another day and knowing you're not alone- is the best.

Tomorrow is Wednesday, and although work is sure to be dreadful, I promise that I have a new experiment up my sleeve.  I think this one's going to be pretty hard for me to do, but it's only 24 hours, what do I have to loose.  Goodnight.

Mission Impossible: Bum Hunt

Being that this was the first day of my try something new mission, I wanted to start off with a bang.  I quickly realized that I didn't have many "bang" ideas.  Well, I think most of my ideas sound like cool things to try out, but I don't think they would translate into anything worth reading that's for sure.  Either way... I woke up this morning, refreshed, no not refreshed, I can never get enough sleep, but eager to try something out of my element.

My first thought was vegetarianism.  I could just try being a vegetarian for a day, I mean, I've got friends and relatives who do it for years surely I can handle a day.  Then I realized there was turkey in the fridge I wanted to eat before it went bad, plus the chicken salads at work are great.  Scratch that idea.  Onto plan B. I can call long lost friends and relatives that I've been putting off and catch up with them.  Well after talking on the phone for 8 hours at work that idea sounded like hell so I moved to plan C.  Considering that half my day was over I realized that this feat was going to have to be something that wouldn't occupy more than a few hours, maybe something that was quick hitting but still effective to my point.  Then it hit me.  Why not give some money to a homeless person!

Let me preface.  If you know me, which I'm sure none of you do (ah, who am I kidding, nobody is even reading this)  you would know that I have a strict stance on homeless people that can be summed up in 3 words: get.a.job.  I know there are always situations and things are always more complicated than they seem, yadda yadda yadda, but I also watch Intervention on A&E and I know that a lot of homeless people spend their money they get from charitable strangers on booze and drugs.  Now, I'm not saying all of them do, but I think I have had one too many encounters with the no good ones than the good ones.

For example, my sister-in-law used to work at a restaurant in downtown KC.  After work one day she was walking to her car with a huge piece of cake she had taken from work.  As she sat down in the driver's seat and tried to shut her door she was greeted by a dirty, smelly, giant bum who had taken it upon himself to barricade her into her car by standing in between her door and the car.  Scared out of her mind she asked the giant homeless fellow if she could help him.  He, naturally, pulled out his usually repertoire, "Oh, I'm so hungry... my baby... lost my job... I'm a veteran..." nonsense.  She, being the kind samaritan that she is, offered up her delicious chocolate cake to the scary man hoping this would suffice.  He thanked her graciously and went on his way.  Scared out of her fucking mind, she quickly shut her door and drove off.  As she rounded the corner she glanced at the bum in her rear view and saw him smell the cake and toss it over his shoulder onto the ground!?  I guess chocolate cake doesn't buy you a speedball these days.

I digress... so based on my preconception of homeless people, I thought I would try to set all of this aside and give them a few bucks.  After all, for some miraculous reason I was carrying cash today anyway, why not.  I figured this would be so simple.  I work downtown and drive past at least 5 prospects everyday.  Of course, they all must have been in a meeting today because I didn't see a god damned one.  I get home from work, disappointed but still think that maybe I'll run into one in this quaint little suburb I live in.  

What better place to cruise for bums than Walmart?  Actually, I didn't go looking for them, I had to drop off some film to be developed and on the way back to the car I finally saw one!  But I panicked!  I didn't know what to do.  He wasn't begging.  He was just chillin in the parking lot with his grocery cart full of shit.  I didn't want to just offer him money if he wasn't asking, it seemed condescending.  So I made awkward eye contact, almost tripped over my feet and speed off to my car.  Dammit!  Missed opportunity.  Ok, I'll find another one before the night is out.  No.... not a single one, ANYWHERE.  This town was dry.  It got so bad that I think I started profiling people as bums in hopes that I could just throw some crumpled dollars at them to make myself feel better.

Eventually I gave up.  I was heading out to meet A, my fiance, and some of his buddies for a beer when I started thinking of ways to write my failed attempt at helping the homeless today.  I could talk about my attempts to hunt them down only to be disappointed with the outcome.  I could maybe even talk about how the homeless are dwindling away from Kansas City, after all, I was a beautiful day for pan handling and not a single one in sight.  And then there he was.  I saw him standing under a tree near a busy QuickTrip holding a sign.  I was a little thrown off by this guy because he didn't look like your typical bum.  In fact, he had a dog, and was propped up against a truck.  I couldn't make out what his sign said so I decided to pull into the QuickTrip and check it out on the way out.  I ran inside and grabbed a water, anxious at what was about to happen. It sounds so dumb but I was seriously nervous!?  What was I supposed to say?  "Uh, here ya go, good luck."  or "I worked all week to give you a couple bucks."  or "Hope you enjoy your Milwaukee's Best, I know I won't."  I had no idea.  

I hopped back in my car and slowly turned out of the parking lot right next to the man with the sign.  As I slowed down at the stoplight and rolled down my window I got a clear view of the sign he had scribbled on an old piece of cardboard.

"NEED GAS MONEY TO GET HOME.  ANYTHING HELPS.  THANKS."

The man came charging to the window, he genuinely looked appreciative.  I leaned over to the passenger's side window and handed him the only 4 bucks I had in my wallet.  "Thank you so much, thank you.  Thank you." And I smiled back and said, "You're welcome."  And that was that.  I turned onto the highway and I was on my way.  But how ironic?  All day I have been searching for a homeless person and in the end all I could find was a man, with a home, but no means of getting there.  Is this what our society has come to?  We can't even afford to enjoy the homes we have worked so hard for?  I wonder where he was headed.  I wonder why he had his dog.  Hopefully not as a ploy to get animal loving ladies to give him some spare change because it definitely worked.  

Let's hope tomorrow is a little more promising.  Goodnight.

My First Time

I have to admit, I've been putting this off for quite sometime now.  I don't know why but for some reason this whole "blog" thing makes me nervous.  I'm not sure if it's the pressure to have faithful readers, to be funny, to keep up with it, or the way some people look at you when you tell them you're a "blogger".  But alas, here I am. 

There are a few different reasons I've been wanting to start a blog but I think the main one is because I'm ready for a change.  You see, in 6 days I'm turning 25.  The big 2-5, a quarter of a century.  I've had a pretty great life so far but for some reason I'm starting to think outside of the box.  I feel like there is so much more to this world than the things we all do day in and day out.  There are so many things I have wanted to do in life (i.e. go skydiving, become fluent in Spanish) or things that I have put off doing (call my Granny, donate to a charity) or just weird things I wonder if I am capable of doing (turn off my cell phone for a whole day, ride the bus to work, start a blog?) It's all of these things that brought me here.  

Everyday I want to try something new or different.  At the end of each day I plan on writing about my experiences.  How it made me feel, how others reacted, if it was anything like I expected it would be.  I hope that in the end I will be able to look back and see how much I've learned about myself and maybe I'll even have picked up a skill or two along the way. 

I would love to have suggestions from any readers (if anyone somehow stumbles across this lonely blog in cyberspace) on something new I could try.  I have quite a few ideas stirring around my head, but I'm sure I'll run out eventually.  

I'm sure you'll get to know me through my adventures each day, but I guess I could give you a formal introduction.  My name is Kate, and I live in Kansas City, Missouri.  Basically find a map and point to the very center of the U.S. and that's where you'll find me.  I studied Journalism and Advertising in college and currently work for a huge corporation here in KC.  I can assure you that you've purchased some of the products from the giant powerhouse I work for.  My job is boring and I usually pass the time texting and reading celebrity gossip.  I have a great family, a best friend of 20 years and an awesome fiance who makes me laugh constantly.  

There is so much more to me, but what fun would it be to give it all up in my first post?  Stay tuned because it's sure to be an experience... whether good or bad we'll soon find out.